Need to lose weight? Looking for a faddish diet with little scientific backing, but plenty of newspaper stories and celebrity endorsements?

Dr Dodgy Perth prescribes the following milk and potato diet which was all the rage in WA in 1940. We completely guarantee you will see the pounds simply drop off.(*)

Breakfast One glass of milk.

Lunch Two or three baked or boiled potatoes and another glass of milk.

Dinner Same as lunch or, for variety, potato soup made with milk and potatoes.

Supper A glass of warm milk to induce sleep.

Every night (and we mean every night) take one laxative.

Follow this diet three times a week, and we’ll let you eat some real food on the other days. But don’t forget the laxatives

Why not try it. What do you have to lose? Apart from the kilos. And maybe your health and sanity.

(*) Dodgy Perth survives exclusively on beer and cigarettes, and has never tried this diet. Consult a registered practitioner before embarking on the latest celebrity fad. Or don’t. It’s up to you, really. You’re a grown up. (If you are not a grown up, please do not try beer or ciggies. They’re bad. Really bad.)