Genuine fakes


Tastier than what we’re serving tonight

Following on from yesterday’s money-saving tips, here are a load of things we will no longer need to buy in the Dodgy Perth household. We particularly like the fake bones in the goose.

(Still no sign of Mrs Dodgy Perth giving us back our credit card, but we remain optimistic.)


Put one pint of dry breadcrumbs into a saucepan with a pint of water. Stir until boiling hot. Take from the fire, add six hard-boiled eggs chopped fine, one pint of chopped walnut, one pint of cold boiled rice, one tablespoon of salt, one tablespoon each of grated onion and powdered sage. Mix well and then stir in three well-beaten eggs. Place an oiled paper in a baking tray.

Form the mixture into the shape of a goose, reserving a portion for legs and wings. Put the ‘goose’ on the paper, form the legs, and put in each a piece of dry macaroni for the bone and press them against the body of the goose. Form the wings likewise and press them down near the back on the paper.

One hour before serving brush the ‘goose’ with melted butter, dust thickly with breadcrumbs, bake in a quick oven one hour, basting two or three times with melted butter. In carving cut off legs and slice body crosswise.

MOCK FISH (1945)

Grate 3 raw potatoes, add an egg, salt and pepper to taste. Beat altogether, and fry until nicely browned.


One tomato and a little sugar in winter, 2 tablespoons grated cheese, 1 teaspoon butter, 2 tablespoons bread crumbs, and a little onion, pinch of herbs, pepper and salt.

Mix all together, and beat in one egg. Put on fire, and stir until thick, then let get cold. This, made into sandwiches, is a great favourite with everyone. Apparently.


Wash and scrape carrots and then cut in fine rings. Cover with water, and boil till soft.

For each cup of pulped carrots use 1 cup sugar and ½ lemon. The sugar and pulp must be boiled until it jellies.